Best funny quotes

"Don't touch any of my weapons without my permission. Well, there goes my plan for selling them all on eBay, Clary muttered. Selling them on what? Clary smiled blandly at him. A mythical place of great magical power."

Cassandra ClareQuote has 1 points. Vote or

"THE FIRST TEN LIES THEY TELL YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL 1. We are here to help you. 2. You will have time to get to your class before the bell rings. 3. The dress code will be enforced. 4. No smoking is allowed on school grounds. 5. Our football team will win the championship this year. 6. We expect more of you here. 7. Guidance counselors are always available to listen. 8. Your schedule was created with you in mind. 9. Your locker combination is private. 10. These will be the years you look back on fondly. TEN MORE LIES THEY TELL YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL 1. You will use algebra in your adult lives. 2. Driving to school is a privilege that can be taken away. 3. Students must stay on campus during lunch. 4. The new text books will arrive any day now. 5. Colleges care more about you than your SAT scores. 6. We are enforcing the dress code. 7. We will figure out how to turn off the heat soon. 8. Our bus drivers are highly trained professionals. 9. There is nothing wrong with summer school. 10. We want to hear what you have to say."

Laurie Halse AndersonQuote has 1 points. Vote or

"You could say sorry, suggested Harry bluntly. What, and get attacked by another flock of canaries?" muttered Ron. What did you have to imitate her for? She laughed at my mustache! So did I, it was the stupidest thing I've ever seen."

J.K. RowlingQuote has 1 points. Vote or

"Holey? You have the the whole world of ear-related humor before you, you go for holey?"

J.K. RowlingQuote has 0 points. Vote or

"Percy wouldn't notice a joke if it danced naked in front of him wearing one of Dobby's hats."

J.K. RowlingQuote has 0 points. Vote or

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