Best George Carlin quotes

Quotes about life

"Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?"

George CarlinQuote has 22 points. Vote or

Peace quotes

"Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity."

George CarlinQuote has 19 points. Vote or

Quotes about music

"Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music."

George CarlinQuote has 14 points. Vote or

Faith quotes

"Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man ... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream, until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you. He loves you and he needs money."

George CarlinQuote has 13 points. Vote or

Quotes about men

"Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid."

George CarlinQuote has 12 points. Vote or

Quotes about life

"The planet is fine. The people are fucked."

George CarlinQuote has 7 points. Vote or

Quotes about life

"The reason I talk to myself is because I'€™m the only one whose answers I accept."

George CarlinQuote has 4 points. Vote or